I can't believe how fast time is passing by. My baby is already 5 months and it's been a little over two months since I returned to work. Seriously? Hard to accept for me.
I can't remember how hard it was leaving Steven Jr when my maternity leave was over, which was only six weeks back then. But I'm sure it wasn't as hard since Hubby had lost his job and was able to stay home with him. He was a stay at home dad, not by choice of course hahaha but boy was I spoiled. He did the cooking, cleaning, took care of the baby, and still managed to pay some bills while I worked a part time and went back to school. Oh how lovely it was. How the heck did we managed that at 19?
This time around it felt like it was going to be a little hard. I wanted to go back to work and start making money again yet at the same time all I wanted was to live the ideal life with my boys and have everyone in a schedule as routinely as possible. I'm still working on that by the way.
I eased in to work by visiting 2x before my first scheduled shift. Each visits was done at different shifts so that the nurses that had taken care of me and AJ during our stay can see him and so that everyone else got to meet him. I honestly think that visiting helped a bit. I'm not sure why though. Maybe the environment reminded me that it was never a bad place to be at in the first place so returning wouldn't be a bad thing either. Whatever it was I'm glad it work for the better.
Since I'm only working two days a week, each of 12hrs and the days are mostly grouped it makes it much better as well. I work for 2 or 3 days in a row then I have off between 3-5 days in a row and at one point during the schedule month I get 10 days off in a row. See, I told you it wasn't bad. Honestly, this would be the perfect schedule for a working mom. Unfortunately I'm not just a working mom. I'm also a nursing student that have lots of studying to do on a daily basis and that's where kaos enters my life. Managing my time between work, school/studying, household chores, cooking, breastfeeding, an infant, a six year old, and a husband (Whew! I'm exhausted just by writing that) is not an easy task.
Some days you'll catch me doing school work on the computer while breastfeeding, which is not that easy when I need to feed from the right side. While others I study while he's napping. This is life, not everything can be perfect I guess. All you can do is try. I know in a few years the hecticness will be over and we'll be in a better schedule. I'll think back and realize that it was all worth it. More so because I managed to be there for my family as best and often as I could. Until then I'll just keep on trying.
Breastfeeding has worked out pretty good too. I thought it would be hard and confusing for my body to produce milk so irregularly with my working schedule and we have definitely encounter some issues along the way but I feel lucky to have made it this long so far. I'm praying for breastfeeding to continue as smoothly as it has been because I just love doing it. It's so natural to me and it fills me with so much joy that I can provide nourishment for my baby this way. Not to mention the bond that we have formed.
So how much do I pump? Well, as much as I dislike pumping while I'm at work I aim for at least 3 pumping sessions every 3-4 hours. I try to feed right before leaving home and then again once I arrive. When things don't go as smoothly I fit 4 pumping sessions in a 12 hour shift every 3 hours. That rarely happens though. I think that due to the fact that I work in a Pro breastfeeding environment full of women they are very understanding to my pumping demands. Motherhood this time around is like a piece of cake.
I'm a firm believer that everything in life happens for a reason and at the right timing whether it takes you weeks, months, or years to realize it. Many times I was worried with how this would turn out, but luckily all the pieces landed on their right spots. I consider myself a very happy gal despite my failures at certain things. The best part of life is though, that you get new opportunities with which new day at succeeding :)
Happy Saturday!
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