Monday, September 23, 2013

Steven's Moments

I meant to write this up right after it happened but I couldn't. I think I might of forgot to actually. 

That son of mine is really something I tell you. 



So last Thursday we are home waiting for daddy. My son is up in his room probably up to no good or doing something he's not suppose to be doing like watching TV or playing with his X-box. I ignore whatever it is that he's doing because you know, he's still a kid after all. And he's done with homework and has eaten dinner. So I let it slide. 

Finally daddy's home. He runs upstairs quick and this is what I hear for the living room. 

Steven Jr: Daddy. Now I really know the tooth fairy is not real. 

Daddy: what? Why would you think that?

Steven Jr: because I was in your room. And I was looking for my DS (and he goes off topic for about two minutes) and guess what I found? 

Daddy: what?

Steven Jr: This! (He shows daddy a little plastic container containing his fallen teeth as he waves his hand) 

Daddy: (walks away, down the stairs,  to hide his smile which is quickly turning into a laughter)

Me: gasp! I thought it had seen something on the TV (Crap. thinking of something quick to come up with before they get down)

Steven Jr: you see. The tooth fairy is not real. Now I know that you were the one that took my teeth and hid them and gave me money. (He gets real serious) why would you lie to me? I'm a big boy now. You can tell me the truth you know. 

They get down to the living room and hubby's face is priceless. Wish I would of had a camera in hand. We both look at each other and smile. 

Me: baby what's going on? (He tells me the story. I still got nothing) 

Daddy: Steven those are my teeth. My mom gave them to me the other day and I was saving them. 

Steven Jr: oh yea so why are the little like mine and are in the container my dentist gave me. 

Daddy: hello because I was a kid too once. And I used to go to the same dentist as a kid.

Steven Jr: no I don't believe you. Those are my teeth. I know. You lied. You both lied to me. (Walks back to his room) 

Daddy & Me: we are laughing our butts off

Where does this kid come up with this stuff lol. Needless to say that we sucked at keeping the tooth fairy real for our child. He hasn't brought up the subject again and neither have we. I guess we'll wait and see how it goes when the next tooth falls out. 

Click here to read about Steven's moment about the tooth fairy being cheap. 

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$50 Target Giveaway


It's been less than a year since I discovered how awesome target is. There was only one in my town and it was about 15 minutes away from me and in the 12 years I've lived here I'd never stepped foot inside. Then last year they built one less then 5 minutes away and boy had I been missing out. I love everything in it. Especially the pizza and Starbucks ;) hahaha

They have nice decor for the home. That's what I've been buying most of from there. Sometimes I just go to check out if there's anything new and to get inspired. 

How do you feel about target? Would you want to win a $50 gift card? Then go check out Not In Jersey. A few of us have teamed up to give a lucky winner a gift card. Make sure you check out the blogs too and follow them if you like what you see ;) 





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52 WOBWAP: A letter to my 16 year old self

Dear Pamela, 

Girlfriend what do you think you're doing? You're only sixteen. Get yourself back home. Trust me, you'll be much better off if you do. Boys are not that important at this age. You shouldn't give them all your attention. Understand that you're in love with the idea of being in love. But you won't find love at this age. You'll only find heartaches and heartbreaks. But don't worry is not the end of the world, you'll get through it. Give yourself time to enjoy this stage. Go out with friends. Build friendships that will last a lifetime. Get into fashion. Focus in school. School is that one area you should focus on. You'll come to regret it in the future if you don't. 

Listen to your mother. Mother always knows best. You'll realize this in a few years yourself and all the issues between you now will be forgotten.  Is the greatest of feeling. Is true what they say, your mother is your best friend, the only one there for you when you really need someone. The one who will love you over all no matter how many mistakes you make or how much you fight. A mothers love goes above and beyond don't take it for granted. 

Please stop with that shyness. Keep your reservations if you like but be a bit more open. Don't be afraid to speak up, to speak your mind. Your accent is just fine, give yourself more credit then what you actually do. Don't get embarrassed if you get corrected, it'll only make you better and more sophisticated! You're beautiful just the way you are, don't let anyone tell you otherwise or make you feel less. 

Save your money. You've been working a year now and have nothing saved or nothing that you've bought that has been worth it. You should really learn to make it a habit, a must with every paycheck. You make decent money for your age don't just throw it away on garbage and fast food. It'll come in handy more than once to have a chunk saved and it'll build good money managing skills. I know I know you want to buy nice things and spend most of your money eating out but really? Do you want to ruin your health eating fast food?

Prepare yourself to start college after high school. Don't let anything stand in your way. Be ambitious. Don't settle. Hard work always pays off. You're smart, but you're letting yourself become too influenced by those that will not be in your future at all. Enjoy their company now but don't get attached and be quick to say goodbye when the time comes. There's only a selected few that will stick around, I'm sure you can identify who they are now. 

Your siblings look up to you. You're their role model. Remember that whatever you do will influence how they turn out to be so be careful with the choices you make. Spend more time with them, as a family. You will all become so close in the future :) 

When love comes knocking at your door, which will be sooner than you can anticipate, don't take it for granted. Appreciate it. Enjoy it. Love it. That's true love and it's hard to come across it nowadays don't let it slide away due to your insecurities. He chose you. You! Be the best that you can be and make it last or you'll end up regretting it every day for the rest of your life. You will marry this man and have two beautiful boys. Your pride and joy. But let's be real, if you don't get your act together you can loose it all. Please focus on what's really important. And don't ever forget, God always comes first. 

Live in the moment, make it count, make decisions you'll be proud of for years on end. 10 years from now everything you think means the world to you now won't even be in you'll life. If you take this advice, life will be just perfect. Everything you ever wanted you'll have. In just 10 short years. Hang in there pretty lady ;) 


Love, 
Your Future Self (at mid 20s) 


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Saturday, September 21, 2013

52 WOBWAP: High school back then

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This was me. In 11th grade. Ooh high school, how much do I not miss you. Or maybe I do. Do I?

You see. I wasn't that known in high school. Does that mean I wasn't popular? Yup! That's exactly what it means. I like to think it was because of my shyness. I wasn't the type to just walk-in in a classroom and start making friends. I was the one that would walk in, grab a seat (in the back because I didn't want to be noticed or the front because I enjoyed the class) and mind my business. Hahaha now that I think of it what was I thinking? I hope my children are not like that at all. 

My freshman year I had my BFF since the 5th grade to hang around with. So I didn't care much about anyone else. I'd even say most of the friendships I made that year were because of her. That was a fun year. The best out of the four. 

Then boyfriends happened. We drifted apart. I got lonely and joined Votech and never looked back. I was in my home school half a day and in Votech the other half. This is we're I made the friendship I still have to this day. In cosmetology to be exact. That's we're my next three years were spent. And I loved every bit of it. Except that I wish I would of went into the health field back then instead of hair because honestly I didn't do nothing with that. Although, I did learn how to cut, color, and perm ;) 

Anyway. It wasn't until my senior year, four months before graduation, when I met my husband and realized that I should of had stay full time. I should of had taken advantage of those four years like I should have. The dances. The pep rallies. The games. The after school activities. The friendships that could of been formed but didn't. 

My hubby was everything I wasn't. So much so that the first few sentences we spoke he asked if I was new to the school because he had never seen me around. That tells you enough don't you think? Shame on him. Shame on me. Sometimes I think of how different could those years have been if I would have stayed. Now I will never know. I do however love how it turned out. And I guess is what really matters after all no. 

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Now lets see. What else do I remember of those sweet years. Oh yes. The free texting. From my little Nokia cell. 

Oooo how about the little snake game. Does anyone remember it? What was the name?

The teenage dance clubs. Oh did my cousins and I take advantage of that hahaha. Did you ever go clubbing at 15? To be fair no alcohol was served, our parents would drop us off and pick us up... Most times. 

Getting my first job at 15 at Taco Bell. Great great times there. 

Getting my license at 16! Oh yeah. I was cool alright lol 

Throwing house parties and kicking my mom out (she never would leave tho. She would hang out upstairs and check up on us from time to time). 

Skipping school. I use to freak out! Always worried we would get caught. And we did. Who skips school and goes back home to hide? This lady right here. 

Leaving lunch to go out to Wendy's and Subway. Those were the good ol' days. 

So many memories. So many different faces. So many firsts.

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Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Adrian 8 Months

Adrian

Little man, little man what a month this one has been. For starters let me just say that I appreciate all the love you have for me. Seeing your face light up after seeing me makes my heart jump with happiness. I'm sure you love to see daddy and big brother too but this bond, this bond that we've created just between the two of us is priceless. I'm sure you love me as much as you show you do as  I'm sure you're also going through some separation anxiety and trust me I love the attention but not being able to clean the house because all you want to do is snuggle with me is no fun. At times you even refuse to go with daddy when I try to hand you over to him. And if I do only for a minute you would spend the full sixty seconds screaming your head off wanting me to come back. I truly hope this is temporary and that you get over it soon because doing chores single handed is quite the challenge.
Adrian Adrian

This month you've been more daring. You are not fully crawling yet but you lounge yourself forward from a sitting position without fear and landing in the traditional crawling position most times while others you land on your belly. When that happens you use your little feet to push up your bottom and move your chest forward just like a caterpillar. Is the cutest thing ever! You've also been pulling yourself up using anything you can possibly get a hold on. Thank god I finally decided to put your crib mattress to the lowest level since you have figured out that the bars are sturdy enough to pull yourself up. That's has been fun because we can play hide and seek. I'm the one usually hiding of course and you get to find me.
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It looks like you want to be Mr. Independent already. At meal time you get upset if we don't give you the spoon so that you can feed yourself. You can guide it to your mouth surprisingly good too. Still, at the end I'm left with the biggest of mess to clean up with food coming out of every opening on your face and every crease from your semi chubby body. Lets not get started on the highchair and floor. Mess Galore. Lucky for me big brother King is a champ at helping out with cleaning the floor ;)
Adrian Adrian

Breast feeding has been going very well. You feed about 5-6 times a day. I've calculated for it to be 20-30 ounces a day. That's on top of cereal for breakfast, a veggie for lunch, and then whatever we're eating for dinner. I thought I was over feeding you but I've been reassured multiple types that this current schedule is just fine. 

Cloth diapering has been going pretty well. I can't believe we've been doing it for over six months now. That's a nice savings in diapers. Have I mentioned how adorable you still look in them? Oh yes dear baby. You're just too cute! As your brother would say.
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You have started to clap your hands together much more frequent now. Not on command of course but we sing many songs and I'm sure you're just mimicking what I do. It's actually pretty cool to see that you are developing memories skills. Is that what it is? You wave your hands a lot too.
Adrian

As most babies at this stage everything you touch goes straight to your mouth. Food, toys, blankets, clothes, you name it. Except for one thing. Your big brother's power ranger toys. You just love watching him play pretend with them. It looks like if you're getting the concept too because when he shares his toys with you when you're upset you calm down fairly quick and then you begin to play with them as he does. I was left speechless when I noticed it the first time. I love all the connections you are making and how much you've developed and have grown in 30 short days. Although I do catch you trying to put them in your mouth at times.
Adrian
Adrian

With just 4 months left till the BIG First Birthday I've started to gather ideas. I look forward to celebrating your first year in our lives. It has been short of amazing. For me and all of our family.

In less then 2 weeks you'll me making your first outing out of the states. We're vacationing in Puerto Rico for a little less then two weeks. That's sure to be a great time! We're all so excited and I'm so nervous as well. I hope you do well out there. 

God bless you my sweet Adrian. You are a prayer come a reality. We love you! 

Mommy. 


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Monday, September 16, 2013

Financial Advice For The Newly Engaged

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I love talking wedding. Even more so when is about ours. Being able to think back and reminisce about those good ol' days. The stressing. The planning. The nerves. The outcome. So there was no surprise to my participation on this article being written up to help out the newly engaged. Hey, any opportunity I get to talk wedding I will certainly take. 

And just to clarify, this post goes out not only to the newly engaged but to any couple out there planning a wedding. These tips are just some of the things that worked for us and we hope they work for others as well.

We got engage back in 2009 and right away we knew that it was going to be a long engagement because we wanted to be able to save enough money to pay for our wedding upfront and not have wedding debt after the wedding. Especially since we were paying for all of it ourselves. 

A few weeks later I started my research on wedding planning and we decided to have a destination wedding. At first because we thought it could save us money. Who were we kidding. Now there, don't get me wrong. You can plan a reasonable destination wedding. However, in our case, as the weeks and months went by the ideas and must haves increased as well as our budget and guest list. If it weren't for that our cost would have been more then half of what it actually cost. Although, I'd say we saved a lot for several reasons.

-We had a long enough engagement in order to be able to save money. 

-We did a lot of DIY projects which is very popular nowadays. I say if it looks easy enough to do yourself it probably is. You don't need to be super creative you just need an inspiration and your ideas.
-Make a budget. Stick to your budget. It's easier said then down but you will be glad you did after all is done and over with.

-Keep in mind the things you think are really important to have. Rank them from most to least that way if you need to cut back on certain things you know where to cut from. 
-Research Research Research. Don't just go with the first company you find for supplies. Do your research. You may find better companies with nicer supplies and better deals. 

-Try to minimize paying with credit cards. The bill will add up eventually and the closer you get to the wedding the more difficult it'll be to pay them off because you'll find other things you want for your wedding. Trust me! 

-Break up your shopping list into categories such as "expensive items, must have, small details etc." and plan for when to buy them. It'll hurt your pockets less and you have time to shop around.

I'm sure that there are plenty of more advice out there and some will work better for some couples then others. I hope ours can help you plan your dream wedding while not breaking the bank ;)

Thank you Jenny for considering us for some financial advice. Stay tuned for the article release later this month! 
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Thursday, September 12, 2013

52 WOBWAP: A room within my childhood home


UntitledThis topic has brought up some challenge to even start it up. For the simple reason that we moved a lot during my childhood. From Dominican Republic to New Jersey then New York and finally Pennsylvania. And even in PA we moved another 3 times before I moved out and started my own family. 

As I started to dig through my collections of pictures to see what I found and what spoke to me. I wanted to make sure that the place I talked about in this post was the place where most of my memories were. And even before going through my album I knew exactly which place it would be. 

This one. This is the place where we lived the longest. Where I lived for for half of my middle school years and all of high school. The place where I brought my mom my first boyfriend. Where I celebrated my 15 years of life. The place that witnessed the many fights and arguments with my mother and siblings.   The place where my family would gather for holidays, birthdays, and parties. The place where we shared my grandmother's last days. And the place my firstborn got to make memories of his own. 

As if that isn't enough this is the very same place my mother-in-law brought my husband home to after his birth. Coincidence or Fate? This too was her childhood home. Where she shared some of those very moments I spoke about above. Where she had many of her first. 

Although this place is no more and although there's a new family that lives there who's making memories of their own, this place will always take up a special space in my heart. Too many happy memories that will never be forgotten. To many shed tears that have turned me into the young adult I am today. This place will always be my childhood home. 


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Sunday, September 8, 2013

Labor Day Weekend + Week + More Recap

Lately I've been horrible at document holiday weekends and things going on in our lives lately. Lets not even get into taking pictures. I have like no recent pictures on my iPhone. What is going on with me? maybe I'm just giving everyone a break because in just a couple of weeks I'll be worse then a paparazzi! Anywho, lets recap a bit shall we.

8/30- I knew I would have a busy weekend ahead so after working a day shift I headed to my ms for dinner and then to the hair salon. Then it was home bound for some cleaning.


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8/31- we had a wedding to attend this day. It was hubby's cousin and he was in the wedding so I meet up with another cousin and his fiance to ride together. What an amazing time we had. Lots of dancing and some drinking. Then it was off to start of hubby's birthday celebration... 

9/1- Happy 27th Birthday my love. May God Bless you, guide you, take care of you, and grant you many many more years of life and health. 


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We celebrated by going to hibachi with the entire family -party of 16 please. Then we went out dancing, again, with some close friends and his brother. We haven't had such a great time in months. My feet are still hurting from all the dancing I did. I sure love me some bachata ;)

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9/2- Happy Labor Day! We ended up at mother-in-law's house this day for some delicious dinner and family time. 


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9/3- my big boy first day of 2nd grade. What?! When did that happen? 

9/4- back to reality and work :-/ 

I've been working days the past two weeks and I love it. They've been long days with having to wake up early and dealing with a child who refuses to sleep through the night but nothing beats being able to be home for bedtime with my boys. I've contemplated looking for a days job but I do like some perks of working nights and being home with AJ during the day among other things. Still, I got curious and looked to see what job openings were in the network and to my surprise there were 6 that caught my eyes. Not one or two. But SIX! So I applied to three of them and prayed. I prayed that if these jobs were for me I will welcome them with open arms and if not well then I'm right where I need to be for now and there must be something better coming my way. Thinking positive is so refreshing for the soul!


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Saturday, September 7, 2013

52 WOBWAP: What being a mother looks like

To me, being a mother are many things. Things that some may not even think can be possible. As teenagers and as we're growing we become these selfish people. Everything is about us and we only have to worry about ourselves. We work mainly to keep up with the trend. We want to look our best when we go out with our friends. Manis and Pedis on a regular. And let me not get started on our hair. In my case it was weekly visits to the hair salon. We live such a lifestyle that we can never imagine fitting a little bundle of joy in our oh so wonderful life. 

Then we become parents. And as a mother myself I can testify that that person we once were is no more. Now don't get me wrong. With time we learn to manage our time and work together with that little bundle to have that fabulous life back. Sorta. Key word there "with time". 



Motherhood is: 
-Putting your kids needs before your own. 
-running late often. 
-skipping doing your hair before leaving the house. 
-being the first to wake up and the last to go to bed. 
-feeling exhausted after a long day to just start over again the next. 
-we spend the rest of our life watching our heart living outside our bodies. 

Now, you might be thinking "is this girl trying to scare the newly pregnant ladies out there?" Because that's what it sounds like. But hear me out a minute. All those things are inevitable once your a newlymother. And like I mentioned before, with time you learn to manage these things and become an expert at working them into your routine. 



And now for the perks of motherhood: 
-nothing brightens your day better then that sweet face staring at you in the morning wanting breakfast. 
- we have and get magical kisses. 
-our kids think of us as a superhero. 
-we become the most important person in someone else's life. 
-we have a motivator. We want to do our best for our kids. Nothing seems impossible. 
-our heart sing after hearing soft gentle voices call us mommy. 
-we become furious beasts with hulk-like strength when it comes to defending our kids. 

Motherhood is the most precious gift on this earth. Mother is only and always number 1! I'd take walking in late to an appointment with my hair undone and clothes smelling like vomit any day to experience the joy of being a mother. 



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Thursday, September 5, 2013

What's wrong with people?

It amazes me how people have so much time in their hands to be judgmental and make others miserable. Or try to at least. Instead of focusing on their lives, their kids, their friends and families they want to focus on yours and point out the bad and tell you how you should live YOUR life.

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For months now I've been getting prank calls, rude and unnecessary messages, etc. is like seriously? Does my life look that amazing that you can bear the sight to see me and mine happy? You know the sad part. That whoever this person is it just has to be someone very close to me due to the amount of information they know about me. That's the scariest part. That I'm walking around  sharing my life with those I love and care about thinking that they care about me too when in reality they only feel envious about my life. Because what else can this be but jealousy? It saddens my heart, really. Not knowing who this person may be that has hatred for me and my family and is willing to try and ruin what I have. I think what hurt even more is the thought of who the person may be. I feel, deep down, that I can't trust anyone in my surroundings and I don't like that feeling. 

At the end of the day I'm going to live my life the way I wish to because that's how I am happy. I'm not going to stop blogging or stop posting in Instagram because someone can't share in my happiness. I'm sorry. What I do plan to do is pray for whoever this person is because clearly they can use some prayer. I like to believe that this person is going through a rough time in life right now and finds that trying to ruin someone else's life will make theirs not look so broken down. I also trust that there's a reason this is happening to me and because of it I'm liking the person is making me be. So I guess I owe this person a thank you after all :) 
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Monday, September 2, 2013

52 WOBWAP: I said I'd never...

When we're young and child-less we can think of a hundred things we would never let our kids do or doourselves to our kids. Then you get pregnant, give birth, and become a mother and bam! All is forgotten. 

For whatever reason, these are the things I said I'd never do...

1. Co-Sleep - from all the horror stories to wanting to maintain our room just that "our room" I didn't want to get our kids used to sleeping with us. Then almost six years after having Steven jr we found ourselves still co-sleeping with this child. He's finally broken the habit and sleeps in his own room, most times, but now AJ has picked up the pieces and sleeps with us. We certainly don't mind it and many times I wake up to find all four of us in our Queen size bed but you know what? Those are the moments I treasure most :) 

2. Use technology to keep them entertained - guilty guilty guilty. I know television is not as educational as a book but it is so beneficial when I'm home alone trying to clean and cook. Or even shower. I do think however that I let Steven spend too much time either watching tv or on the iPad but I'm working on that. There'll be new and strict rules about this this school year in our home.  

3. Skip bedtime - this is a bit harder. I don't know if its my culture but many times we're never home for bedtime and thus both kids don't make it to bed well past it. I'm sure Steven jr doesn't mind it. AJ in the other hand gets so cranky as the time passes. If we're not home I try to get them ready for bed with baths etc wherever we are in case they fall asleep on the drive home that way we don't wake them to get them ready instead of just putting then in bed. Not being home is mostly the reason they never make it to bed by bedtime

4. Let my kids look bummy - letting Steven pick his own clothes even though they don't match is letting him be himself. Letting him learn to be independent. I've realized that that's not being a irresponsible parent. That's allowing them to create their own identity. Now that at times I have to put my foot down because boy does my son have no sense of fashion hahaha (he gets that from his momma hahaha) but he's learning. He's getting there. With AJ. Well that's another case. 

5. Compare my kids - whether is to each other or other kids. Not comparing is hard. And I don't mean comparing as in competition on who wearing what and such. I mean with educationaland developmental milestones. Like in AJ's case. I know a few babies born around the same time and some are more advance at certain things and at times I've found myself saying well AJ isn't doing that. Why isn't he? Why Is that baby so much bigger? Bla bla bla I don't worry about his development because I know all babies are different and do things at their own pace but as parents sometimes we just can't help it. Am I alone on this one?

Ooh parenthood. What a journey and a learning experience you've been. 







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